Terminal Uniqueness
I suffer from terminal uniqueness. I fear that I am not special if I accept that I am like others. And, in the same breath, I am so happy that I am not alone. It’s such a dichotomy of thinking in my head.
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The idea that I am somehow different than everyone else at the meetings has interfered with my recovery over the years. It is a tricky twist of the ego. I am so grateful for the realization that I am one among others. I am just like others in my disease and recovery process. It is a comfort to be like other in this regard.
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For many years, I thought I was incapable of losing weight and recovering. Everyone but me. Through humility, awareness, prayer, and faith in the program, I realized I am NOT unique. It works if I work it and I am honest. It’s simple, not easy. Occasionally I fall back into old thinking and feel like I’m different again. It only takes a meeting, an outreach phone call, a chat with my sponsor, or a reading to get my mind right again. I am grateful that I have a community of people just like me.